[ Action, Some Journal ] BACKDATED to the 11th .059

[markofthebrave]

[On April 9th, Katara had been told that she was an "error," and doomed to die by a boy with the face of the man she loved. As you can imagine, the rest of the day was not spent cheerfully; rather after wandering about for some time, Katara returned home to make dinner and then quietly excused herself to write some letters, and then bend into the early morning hours.

On April 10th, the sun rose on a Katara who was entirely herself, and the sudden onslaught of memories drove her to her knees. In the early hours of the morning, she wept beside the river, feeling inside out and torn apart and lost... eventually she returned to her room in order to sleep the sleep of the deeply exhausted.

She did not wake until April 11th. This was another slow day, where she read the letters her other self had written and decided not to give them out, ended up seeking some unlikely advice, and generally stuck to her schedule, feeling... strange.

But today? Today she woke up feeling a little more like herself. It was a Thursday, which meant meeting Nami for bo practice after school (which she... finally got back to attending, sorry Professor) and then made dinner. She may glance through the journal a bit more than normal; she may even contemplate attempting to contact someone, and... eventually, she does make two locked posts:]

[Written | Private to Robin]
Hey. I know you'll probably say you're fine, but I just wanted to ask how you were doing.

[Voice | Private to Wolfwood]
Do you have a minute?

[Later that evening, she'll be practicing by the river, under the light of a waning moon.]

Comments

[herotypical]

"And I'm a little more used to being the one running around keeping the Shifted kids from hurting themselves on their shiny new fake memories. Usually, I'm...in the unaffected camp."

A half-shrug.

[markofthebrave]

Ah. That makes even more sense. "I've... gone through this sort of thing a lot. The first time was the worst. Well, that and Luceti Valley.

"It's really important to remember who you are, and that you're not the same as that other person. But it's also important to acknowledge that the memories are part of you now. You don't have to try to cut them out - it's part of you, but it's not you."

[herotypical]

The Slayer's voice shook is an absolutely uncharacteristic way: "M-memories. They're...it's just that they're more important than they seem. What they are. What they make up. This sorta thing...happens now and then. Back home.

New memories."

[markofthebrave]

...so this was something which had happened to Buffy before Luceti. That was... hellish.

"It does?"

[herotypical]

"A-and it's not...always terrible."

[markofthebrave]

Katara tilted her head in inquiry.

[herotypical]

"My...sister was here. For a while. Dawn. Dawn Summers." Duh. "But she wasn't always my sister..."

[markofthebrave]

She blinked. "What do you mean?"

[herotypical]

"It's kind of complicated -- you'll have to bear with me. And try and just follow along. Interrupt me if it gets too kooky, okay?"

Buffy, too, leaned forward on her elbows. "My sister -- she...didn't always exist. Not as she does now. A group of monks had a very important...something. And they needed that something safe. So they gave it human form. And they gave that human form to the Slayer in a way that ensured she couldn't not protect that something. They made me a sister. And they made memories, too."

[markofthebrave]

Katara's brow furrowed. Her instinctive response was - that's terrible - and it was. But... "You didn't have any other brothers or sisters?"

[herotypical]

"No. I guess...I guess I was an only child? Not that I remember it like that. The new memories completely overwrote what reality used to be, I guess."

[markofthebrave]

"...wow, that's... horrifying."

[herotypical]

Softly: "It's hard to be horrified when..." How to put this delicately? "Dawn's real. Flesh and blood. Human. An innocent in all of it. She didn't even know who she was, at first. And now? It doesn't even matter. A-and all I knew, when I learned, was that I love her. And she's precious to me. And if most of her existence is only memories then I can...then I can be okay with that."

[markofthebrave]

She disagreed. It might be okay, but it was still horrible. So for now, she just nodded.

[herotypical]

"If you wanna get real existential about it all...? Well, how do any of us exist in the past except in memories. Right?"

[markofthebrave]

"No... I know what you mean."

It was why she insisted that their other selves were, in fact, other selves.

[herotypical]

"Whenever here changes us -- gives us something new or different...I can't help but compare the two and the fact that I compare them at all is sickening. Dawn's situation is unique. It wasn't calculated to test anything. Not like these experiments."

[markofthebrave]

She nodded, "The experiments don't... create anything that stays. Nothing that's real."

[herotypical]

"I wouldn't undo those memories of her for all the world...and I'd sooner -- well, the monks made her out of me. So she's still related, in a way."

[markofthebrave]

"I see. ...all the same, it's understandable why you'd compare them. Even if you can accept it with Dawn as just... a new way to get a sister, it's still a primary experience you had with this sort of thing."

[herotypical]

"Yeah. I mean -- there've been other things back home but nothing as...permanent as Dawn. Have I told you about the time we all started singing?"

[markofthebrave]

"...no."

And she was pretty sure she'd remember something like that.

"What happened?"

[herotypical]

"One day? We all woke up and...everyone was singing. Their feelings and their secrets and it was all very Broadway. There was dancing. Very spooky."

[markofthebrave]

Yeah, Buffy. You should have at least got a kiss from that one hot guy.

"...I don't know what Broadway is, but that sounds a little like the experiment when we had our thoughts broadcast. That wasn't very fun. And it definitely sounds spooky."

[herotypical]

...Yeah. She wasn't thinking straight.

"It was a lot like that. But with more singing and performing and chorus lines. Broadway's this place where a lot of musicals are performed."